My Density

Back to the Future is one of my all time favorite movies. I love it when George McFly sees his beloved Lorraine and says “You’re my density… I mean, my destiny!”

This past year has brought so much change for my family and I. Some of the changes have been hard, and others have been huge blessings to us. Last January, I left both of my part-time jobs to take on a full time position with a non-profit ministry. It was an exciting challenge, and I really needed a change.

But by summertime, there was an emptiness setting in.

In late August, I saw a random Facebook advertisement for auditions for a community chorus. Well, that’s something I always wanted to do, but couldn’t because of juggling kids and work and all that other stuff. But now, it was something that I could make time for! I emailed the contact person, and they soon called me to set up an audition time.

It was so fulfilling to do the audition! I sang a prepared piece, and then sight read a few pages of music they handed me. It was a piece of cake- and I was so proud of myself for doing something that I had been wanting to do for so long. I hadn’t done an audition or sang in a chorus in nearly 25 years! Shortly after the audition, I received an email saying I had been selected to be in the chamber ensemble chorus.

The first night of practice, I fought back tears as I sang. I didn’t realize how much I had missed making music! It was like finding a piece of myself that I had lost.

I often have dreams- and they are mostly about music. Singing, teaching lessons, directing choirs… I have had these dreams for years. But I have struggled with the idea that being a music teacher is not enough. I have struggled through the years to find the thing God has called me to do, and all the while it has been right in front of me.

A few weeks ago, I called the music studio where I used to teach lessons part time. Are you looking for a voice teacher? I asked the owners.

Julie, we never hired anyone after you because we couldn’t find anyone with the right qualifications.

And in that moment, I felt a peace come over me.

Making music is my density…. er, I mean my destiny.

It’s the one common theme of my life- the thing that brings me the greatest joy and connects me to God. And making music connects me to other people. I LOVE making music with others and helping them to find joy in it!

So, with my husband’s blessing, I stepped out in faith and recently quit my full-time job to pursue teaching voice and piano lessons again. I am ready to pour out my skills and encouragement on others through music. I just know that the Lord has people waiting for me.

But more importantly- I’m just following the Lord’s nudges.

And that IS enough.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.- Jeremiah 29:13

Do it!!!!

I did a “thing”.

Do people even say that anymore? lol

For YEARS I have longed to sing again in a choir, but between work, family stuff, and ministry commitments, just couldn’t find the time.

But two weeks ago, I kept seeing an add for the Virginia Consort Chorus pop up. Coincidence?

Nothing is a coincidence for people that follow Jesus! Each time I saw the ad pop up, I head that still, small voice say “do it!” Each time I saw the ad, the voice got louder and louder… until after seeing the ad about 10 times, I finally said out loud “Okaaaaaaaay! I’ll do it!”

I auditioned and it felt so good to do something like that after all these years!

We had our first practice this past Monday. It was heavenly to sing again with so many amazingly talented musicians. I am super excited and thankful that it has worked out for me to sing again!

And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.- Colossians 3:17

When We Used to Sing

“When We Used to Sing”

Memories, they flood my mind

I haven’t been here

in such a long, long time

Some things, they stay the same

Our outsides may waste away

But the heart will never change

I never thought I’d feel

a connection so real

after all this time

And I’m singing on a mountain top and

praying it would never stop

and treasuring the bond the music brings

The passion rushes back to me

of all the sweet, sweet melodies

that used to ring

when we used to sing

harmonized and unified

we raise our voices to the sky

in perfect time

praises raised and stories told

lyrically they all unfold

in perfect rhyme

I never thought I’d feel

a connection so real

after all this time

I wrote this song last night about our reunion last weekend.  It is about reconnecting with friends and celebrating the bond we all create when we make beautiful music together!

It’s not just notes and words

One of my dreams came true this weekend. I got to go back to my old high school and sing some of my all-time favorite choral songs again with all of my old friends!! (ok, we’re not really that old, are we??)

This year marked the 25th anniversary of the opening of our high school- and Dr K, our choral director, has been there since the beginning.  So to celebrate, he invited anyone who had ever been a part of his top ensembles to join together for a reunion… except it was so much more than that.  I reconnected with my awesome high school choral director and some amazing friends- many of whom I haven’t seen in 15-20 years!

When I was in high school, the only thing that brought me joy was singing.  Chorus was everything to me.  All of my good friends were the ones I sang with in the Madrigal group.  We did everything together.  During my 3 years in high school, most of my day involved counting down the classes to my Madrigals bell.  My senior year, I took 3 music classes… and I also ate lunch in the choir room… so technically I spent half a day EVERY SINGLE DAY in that place- and I wouldn’t have traded a single moment of it.

I really can’t put into words how my chorus teacher changed my life. His love for music was contagious.  He said over and over throughout the years, “It’s not just notes and words.”  Anyone can sing the right words and notes on a page but it doesn’t make it music.  He taught us that music comes from the heart… and that good music must be sung with passion!  When I graduated high school,  “It’s not just notes and words” was my senior quote in the yearbook. Music was my life.

So, I went to college and got my degree in Music Education and even had the amazing experience of going back to my high school to student teach under him!  Again, he was a wonderful mentor and a friend.  I was so blessed to have that opportunity to reconnect with him as a college student, and to learn more about his craft of conducting and transforming notes and words into the most moving pieces of music I’ve ever heard.

So this past weekend, we sang many of our favorite songs together- again!  As I walked into the chorus room, I could already hear the harmony floating down the hallway.  I fought back tears as I looked around me.  It was overwhelming.  The sound of everyone singing again… the room looked like it had been frozen in time…we didn’t skip a beat.  Every breath, every ounce of emotion was there.  The memories, the smiles, the music, everything seemed as if no time had passed.  

And the most wonderful part of the whole thing was to see the impact Dr K has had on so many students over the years. I looked around at all the teachers, doctors, professionals, musicians, pastors…and I saw the incredible bond that we all share- one that will never be broken.

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.  Ecclesiastes 4:12 

This is the song that every Madrigal group at our high school has sung at the end of every single concert for the past 25 years, and this is all of us singing together this past weekend.

May the Good Lord bless and keep you, till we meet again…