My husband called me the other day to say hi while he was at work.

“Are you enjoying your day at home?” he asked me.

Well, to be honest, I wasn’t at home at all.  “Umm.. yes…” He must have heard the hesitation in my voice, because he laughed and asked me where I was.

“I’m just leaving church, and then I’m going here and there…”  I continued to rattle off the things I wanted to get done before the girls got home that day.  I had intended on staying home all day, but as I often do- I began to feel guilty about taking a day off and decided to take care of a few things.

I continued giving him the checklist of all the things I had done so far…”and before I left the house, I ran the dishwasher and got a load of clothes going.  Oh-and I gave the dog a bath.” I admit, I was pretty proud of all the stuff I had crammed into that short time span.

I waited on the other end of the phone for his verbal “pat on the back”,  but it didn’t come.

“You know, it really is ok for you to not be doing something.”

I was speechless.

Because deep down, I am really not ok with doing nothing.

I feel guilty.

For many years my self worth was found in the things I did.  The more I did, the more I felt worthy as a person… and worthy of being loved. I honestly still struggle with this.

But my self-worth is not found in what I do

or in the number on the scale

or in the amount of my paycheck

or in the approval of others

Saving is all His idea, and all His work.  All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It’s God’s gift from start to finish!

Ephesians 2:8

We are worthy simply because we are His.

There’s nothing we can do to earn His grace or His love.

And after all these years of life, I still ponder this great mystery of His- that I am loved unconditionally

and that I have a husband who loves me unconditionally, too 🙂

Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.  

Ephesians 5:2


17 thoughts on “Self-Worth

    • Unconditional love is loving without anything expected in return- loving with no strings attached. My husband doesn’t love me because of what I can do for him, he loves me for who I am. There is nothing I could ever do to make him love me more. The ultimate example of unconditional love is the life of Jesus. John 3:16 says For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. Jesus gave His life for us- because He loved us that much. God doesn’t love me because of what I “do” for Him- He loves me simply because He created me.


  1. What a beautiful post, Julie. I can most certainly relate to your need to “do.” We are indeed worthy because we are His and now and then we just need to remember that. By the way, sounds like your husband is a “keeper” 😉 Blessings to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Julie I am going to jump in here and side with your husband. There is nothing more a husband who truly loves his wife wants than for her to be abel to be all God wants her to be. That includes has God would have it. To feel loved and valued. To be special. Carolyn will do the same thing with me sometimes. I always wonder what I did to make her feel that way. I figure it must be how a woman looks at things and feels about her responsibilities. None the less our wives deserve to just go be there selves and enjoy their life. Carrot has a list a mile long everyday. Yes she ends up at Marshalls with a couple new blouses. You know what, I smile she made me happy, because it made her happy. You got yourself a keeper. So does he.

    Much love Tom

    Liked by 1 person

    • Tom- that was just the sweetest comment! Sounds like you and Carolyn are a match made in heaven 🙂 I am a thrift store shopper- so that’s usually where I end up for my “retail therapy” lol! Some days it is hard for me to shut my brain off…always something important to think about. That’s one reason I love watching the sunset every evening…its His way of focusing all my thoughts on Him!! And yes- my hubby is definitely a keeper 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Julie that is so neat. You know Carolyn voulanteers at a Methodist thrift store both to help with missions and you guessed it, she’s a thrift store junkie lol. Most of our clothes come from there. She’s a keeper. That’s why I don’t complain when she goes on her fix spree lol. Just kidding. I have to say though like you my first love is Jesus. He made it all happen. Thanks Julie for being such an encourager and fun person.

        Peace to you my friend

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sounds like Carolyn and I have a lot in common 🙂 I tell my hubby to be thankful that I am a thrift store shopper! I love the bargains, but I really enjoy talking to all the different people there. And they seem to play lots of oldies music which I love, too 🙂 And yes- Jesus is the reason for everything!! Thank you for being “you” and for always leaving thoughtful, encouraging words 🙂 many blessings to you and Carolyn!!

        Liked by 1 person

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