restless

With every breath

I’m falling deeper

into the hands

of my great Keeper

I’m restless till

I rest in You

With every thought

my vision clearer

upward bound

my heart draws nearer

only resting

when I rest in You

I had the pleasure of having a massage recently- cashing in on an awesome birthday gift from my hubby. As I laid on the table, my tense muscles crumbled under the monstrous pressure of the hands that kneaded me. Jokingly, the massage therapist told me she calls her job “steam-rolling”.

At times the pressure was so great, it was uncomfortable– but the more I emptied myself of any thoughts, the more I was at peace…not aware of any discomfort. As I laid there, I thought about how much I crave being quiet… but how I wrestle with my own thoughts in those quiet moments instead of resting in Him.

Restless.

I long for quiet when I am in the midst of noise… and yet, when I sit in silence, the sound of my own thoughts is deafening to me.

When I am alone, I want desperately to be with people…and yet when I am with people, I crave solitude. Restlessness- always brought about by my own thoughts and my own desires.

When I desire peace and fail to look to the Prince of Peace- I am always restless.

I am restless until I rest in Him.

O God, you are my God;
    I earnestly search for you.
My soul thirsts for you;
    my whole body longs for you
in this parched and weary land
    where there is no water.